Heiß

Well, it's summer. The flowers are all finished blooming, the trees are in full-shade-mode, the swimming pools are open, the large lawnmowers are running amok in the city parks, and people have no problem laying down on the grass and reading a book, taking a nap, or sipping on their open container. The stores now advertise their new seasons after they liquidated everything with a long sleeve or down padding. The best part? Daily highs are somewhere around 30 Centigrade, or 85 Fahrenheit.

In the USA, particularly Texas, which is currently at 40 Centigrade (100 Fahrenheit), this is Antarctica. The humidity is pretty high (I feel perpetually sticky, just like in Austin), and the temperature drops pretty quickly in the evening around 8:30pm (whereas in Austin it's hot the entire night.) There is usually a nice, light breeze wherever I go, complete with the rustling of tree branches, ready to evaporate that slight condensation around my brow. It's not entirely unbearable to walk around downtown and casually pick up an ice cream cone from the Italian vendors on the corner, and the amount of gross-nasty feeling is nothing like how I felt after walking to the mailbox in Austin. So it's not that bad outside.

But golly gee. Inside is just unbearable. The Germans have not come to the advantages of air conditioning.

Granted, during most of the year air conditioning is not needed at all - that heater is what keeps comfort levels tolerable. The Germans have mostly made up for this mechanical convenience by placing windows that actually open in most buildings (good luck finding windows that open out on most buildings in the USA, especially dormitories, school buildings, and offices.) It's fine for my humble abode because it faces north - never any direct sunlight.

The classrooms? Unbearable. Often, there is only one window in the entire room. This room houses anywhere between 15 and 20 students sitting in close proximity. The wiggles of discomfort coming from everybody, the quick brush-by whiffs of the armpit, and the self-fanning with your class handouts are a frequent sight. Many bathrooms also lack proper ventilation, so the rooms are not only scorching hot and stale, but the smell from that woo-hoo who missed tends to ferment and cause nausea.

Even the library is a victim of this stuffy-ness. I went to find a book, and I couldn't help but feel that I would pass out from heatstroke and lack of ventilation. Open a few windows, please. People were frantically typing on their computers, working up a sweat not from the stress of homework and that impending oral report, but instead from the sweatshop conditions in which they were working. It was slightly unbearable. My body feels sticky just thinking about it.

I refuse to partake in another of the behaviors I've seen many Germans partake in: Walking around barefoot. First, they wear their shorts, showing some super-white legs, and then they take off their shoes and not only sit there, but walk around. They not only walk around the room without their shoes (and socks), but they walk down the street, and go into the store, and eat at the cafeteria. Yesterday, there was a man on the bus not wearing a shirt. He sat down next to an old lady who seemed nonplussed by the situation.

For the sake of something holy, it's only 85 degrees, people. Keep your shirts on. But really, it is hot.