Large Words

Greetings.

Today was the day on which I experienced my first German contract. It is the day on which I received my Studentenwerk housing contract in the mail. Once I actually figure out what is being said, I'm sure it will be much less overwhelming. But it's hard to remain calm when one sees gigantic words such as "Betriebskostenverordnung" (running costs included in your rent?), "Benutzungsbedingungen" (terms of use?) and "Lastschrifteneinzugsermächtigung" (still trying to figure that one out...) in large, bolded section headers. Even though contracts are universally difficult, I am reminded of a small joke that I once heard:

In heaven, the British will run government, the French will cook, and the Germans will run industries. In hell, the British will cook, the French will run industries, and the Germans will run the government.

I understand that this joke stems back to the days of mid-century Germany and isn't very polite to any of the three named nations, but it still carries a bit of poignancy. The British have maintained a stable governance through the turbulent 19th and 20th centuries but haven't quite figured out how to please a palette. The French can tease our tastebuds, but, well, we don't have to talk about their industries. The Germans may be the "Könige" of efficiency, but boy are the Germans notorious for their bureaucracy and the crippling effect of their large words. In the US, we take for granted the ease with which we can do things - standing in line at the DMV is about as bad as it gets. In Germany, one must register, and register, and re-register. I have been warned repeatedly of the urgency with which I should register my presence in Germany with the City Hall - one person recommended doing it before I even check into the dorm. One (even German Citizens) can't move to a different unit in their apartment building without registering (for fear of a large fine and public shame, perhaps).

Eventually, after I've made my way through the maze of my "mietvertrag," I'll get back to you on the state of affairs. I guess it's off to a corner with my German-English dictionary.